originaljackass | Ch. 4 - People spend their whole lives wishing they were Jack of Fables

[Great thing about New Feather cycles? Lots of pretty new faces, all of them in skimpy sundresses, many of them in need of a strapping hero to get them settled in. Jack has been kind enough to oblige a fair number of them. Not as many as he'd like, as he's been beaten to the punch several times. ~~Hiatuses, go figure.~~]

[Written]

To all the hotties out there, New Feathers or not, I'm Jack of the Tales. I'm in the market for helping out with some odd tasks. A man's got to keep himself busy, right? So lay something on me. As long as it ain't scrubbing toilets, I'm up for it. But just know that my usual line of work is hero business. It's part of why I'm so legendary.

[Some pen taps go here before:] In fact, if anyone's got any suggestions for a more permanent line of work, I'll hear it. [True, Jack is a conman and likes to skirt by doing nothing, but he's been doing that for a month now and it's going to drive him crazy.]

[Answers to his question or not, Jack is going to take a walk around town, with an absentminded dog-sized blue ox following him around. Jack could care less about the company. Aside from stopping in on the stores, he'll be having dinner at Seventh Heaven and later having a beer at Good Spirits. Also, he might be hanging around outside C4 for any new renters that have moved in. Of the female persuasion, of course, but he'll talk to guys too. He just won't care as much.]

((ooc: I suck at hiatus okay, shut up. Tags will come in spurts here and there.))

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ she is seriously considering going steady with a man who might have more hair than most monkeys. ]

My virtues are both many and varied.

Sounds to me you're avoiding the question.

Once you've willingly kissed a vamp with his game-face on, you can pretty much never be called shallow ever.

How about a two hundred-fifty pound, bespectacled loser who thinks facial hair is a good replacement for a chin?

Depends -- can said loser take me in a fight?

In Street Fighter, maybe.

[ oh wait. andrew mentioned this once... ]

I don't play video games. The fights? So fake.

So you only value a man who can slap you around a bit, then.

More like I don't want to play babysitter on patrols or on the field.

Don't believe in love without gore, eh?

I don't believe my life is ever safe enough for the two to never mix.

Right. The life of a busy bartender, burdened with sometimes being called to a war for five days at a time.

...We all go home sometime.

I didn't think we were talking about home.

[ they hadn't been -- but it's on buffy's mind thanks to willow's departure. ]

It's still true.

So no romantic entanglements for you, then.

[ how incredibly aware she is of the fact that jack sparrow may be reading this.

diplomatically: ] Not on a whim, no.

[Aha.] So seeing as if you'd fall for a guy here in Luceti, where you don't even have to worry about a street mugging, I take it you aren't as concerned about how well a guy can defend himself, right?

Been there, done that, got the guy I fell for got sent home t-shirt of heartache.

And I feel real bad for you, but we weren't talking about that either.

[So just admit he's right already.]

[ that's like asking a pig to sing an opera. ]

No. We were talking about you and a job search.

Right. How about you throw in a good word for me with Guy? I've got a feeling I know more about serving drinks than the whole lot of you put together.

He doesn't just hire us for our mixology skills.

I've got people skills down, but I don't think he'd go for it. I offend his sense of chivalry.

Don't forget his sense of decency. I think you probably offend that one, too.

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