Ch. 1 - There is no plan without Jack of Fables

[originaljackass]

[Voice]

Hey Kennedy, meet me at Good Spirits. We're going to have a drink.

[Despite his fantastic lack of an intro post, Jack is actually already settled into Luceti, having already been around for over a week now. Having noticed the large quantity of people who walk around with weapons, Jack has already looted the smithy for a pistol and a perfectly preserved Confederate Officer's saber he'd kept since the war. Sure, it had no special powers and would probably shatter if he used his full strength hitting something with it, but damn if he didn't look cool. Hell, he even has his old officer's hat to go with it.

He'll be available at Good Spirits both before and after meeting Kennedy (if indeed the poor sailor shows up) to be poked and prodded. Or if that's not your thing, he'll be taking his time on his way home in spite of the heavy snowfall (which barely bothers him anyway), whistling a forgotten tune, and wondering what a man is to do in a moneyless economy when his greatest ambition is having lots of money. Which he already had in the real world.]

Comments

[Action]

[simplestgift]

Really? They wrote a book about him?

[Action]

[originaljackass]

[Whether it's a fictional account or a real story, Jack couldn't tell you.]

Sounds familiar, anyway.

[Action]

[simplestgift]

[Whatever. This is the best news Archie's had in a week! More than a week! Maybe they have it at the library. It might give him a sense of closure to know how the rest of Horatio's life played out.]

Thank you. [He tops off Jack's drink again, then his own. Grasping the glass, he lifts it in a little toast.] Now. You were saying about people dying and your plan and all?

[Getting back to foreboding stuff, now that his spirits are lifted. If he doesn't know Jack's plans, how can he thwart them?]

[Action]

[originaljackass]

Simple. Earn the trust of the population and when the time's right, lead us all to freedom. I've done it once. Damned if I can't do it again.

[Of course his escape plan was successful insofar as about a dozen out of a hundred people escaped. But he would later return to that same place and lead them in glorious battle against a far worse enemy. While eating a taco.]

[Action]

[simplestgift]

And for those who don't want to escape?

[It's not that Archie's not homesick, but leaving Luceti isn't exactly going to do much for that. He's been trying to think of this as a fresh start, after all. Looking at how he's sitting at a bar with Jack, he's not doing too well on that front.]

[Action]

[originaljackass]

They can stay. [A glance at him as he tests the water.] Especially if they've got nothing to go back to.

[Action]

[simplestgift]

[A pause. Archie doesn't have much of a poker face, to say the least, so he gives a visible twitch of discomfort.]

That's not a plan, Jack. That's an objective. As I understand it, you may as well try to walk to the moon as escape to your own world. What are you going to do about that?

[Action]

[originaljackass]

[Thought so.]

One step at a time, pal. A good strategy is having all the good cards exactly where you want them, then you just have to wait for the opportune moment.

[Action]

[simplestgift]

And what's in it for you, helping people you don't know get back to a world you'll never visit?

[Archie's beginning to wonder about this guy. Either he's more sinister than he thought, or...less sinister than he's making himself out to be.]

[Action]

[originaljackass]

I get to go home, where I have a briefcase filled with enough gold to make me a king a dozen times over. But I'm smart enough to realize, great as I am, I can't do it all on my own.

[He doesn't know that, once he does get home, he gets to turn into a dragon and face the potential fate of his son slaying him.]

Jack the Dragon? Really?

[simplestgift]

That's a surprise.

He's ruled by narrative convention. What happens to a jerkass with a ton of gold?

[originaljackass]

See? I don't even have to pretend that much. No dastardly plans to take over Luceti here.

Apparently he becomes a dragon.

[simplestgift]

I meant I'm surprised you can't do it all on your own. I was beginning to think you'd leapt from the womb wrestling hydras.

A dragon on a bed of gold. Smaug all over.

[originaljackass]

No, but I wouldn't put it past me if I had. [In fact, he should probably work that into his own backstory.]

[simplestgift]

[That was not a suggestion! What is wrong with this man?]

Is there a point to my continued presence here, Jack?

[Besides the fact that, even though he won't admit it, he's starting to sort of like this particular not-Scotch?]

[originaljackass]

[He leans back his stool, draping one arm over the back of it.]

Seeing as you don't have the stones to work with me on this one, I guess not.

[simplestgift]

You haven't even said how I have anything to do with it!

[He leaves the word "blockhead" off the end of that sentence. Unfortunately, he's also taking the bait. Just a little bit.]

[originaljackass]

For starters, it doesn't involve selling me out.

[He's just going to milk it a little more.]

[simplestgift]

Get to the point, Jack!

[originaljackass]

Wingman, Kennedy. Partner, buddy, whatever. We team up. Every leader needs that one guy who says, "I believe in you, Jack!" After that, they all fall in line. You can be that guy. Like Trusty John, only without the security guard uniform.

And for your part? I make sure I find a way that you get to stay here. Or go to whatever other world you like. One where you're a bit... livelier.

[simplestgift]

[Archie was just about to say no, but...]

You...

[The possibilities. Impossibility aside, the possibilities.]

You would do that?

[originaljackass]

I'm a man who gets results. Even when Lady Luck herself was out to get me, I was able to beat her at her own game.

[Yes, he does mean the actual person.]

Besides... [And this is where he flashes a grin.] I've been dead before. The real trick to staying alive is having connections.

1/2

[simplestgift]

[Archie is not an optimist. Not anymore, at least. But he's not an entirely rational person, either, and no matter how much his good sense tells him to stay far, far away from the guy offering things that aren't his to give, there's a tiny, stubborn part of him that knows exactly how he'll feel if Jack comes through and Archie never took him up on his offer.]

2/2

[simplestgift]

I'll...th-think about it. I can't promise you anything else.

[He can't even believe he just said that.]

[originaljackass]

[That earns you another pat on the back.]

Good man. Here, have another round. [Taking the bottle, he refills both their glasses. Between the two of them (and mostly Jack), that bottle is getting near empty.]