originaljackass | Ch. 9 - You only wish you could be like Jack of Fables

[Voice]

All the kids were packed at the beach yesterday. I took a stroll through there, just to be reminded that over half this place is under the age of seventeen. What a pain.

[Having spent a few centuries in a town full of immortals, teenagers and children were a pretty rare sight, save for those stuck at that age like Pinocchio and Ozma. So for a womanizer like Jack who has standards about the age of the Mundys he dates, this isvery much a pain in the ass.]

Let's have our own beach shindig. One evening, at sunset, with a cabana for serving drinks. There's not as many of us people who are on the better side of twenty, but us old people have to stick together. [Yet despite being hundreds of years old, Jack has never, ever felt old.] Anybody willing to throw their hat in for the bar tending? I'll even throw the hut together for you. [After all, he did make the House that Jack Built.]

Oh, one more thing. To all the beautiful new babes out there - and I'm not talking to you schoolgirls out there - welcome to Luceti. I'm Jack Horner. We should get to know each other better.

[Action]

[Meanwhile, Jack's day is a rather interesting one as he sits at home and rubs his gut. When did he get a gut? How could he get a gut? He doesn't like this, not at all. He's vaguely terrified he's going to turn into a dragon all over again. Ultimately it drives him out of the house and to the stores, so he can look for a weight lifting set. Though when he does finally locate one, he realizes his own super strength is going to be working against him if he actually wants to get legit exercise. Damn. It prompts him to get back on the journals a few hours later with a different message.]

[Written]

Anyone got any tips for staying in shape? I mean, besides the diet and exercise shit. [A pause as he considers. He doesn't have the patience or discipline for that kind of thing.] Like a job or something.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I'm open for ideas.

The three requirements to a good party; good food, good music, and keep the drinks flowing.

Well how's that for you, I've got all those accounted for. Well, at least once I locate some speakers.

Could check and see if the nightclub has anything they could loan you.

There's an idea. Maybe some kind of trade.

Don't know who else might have speakers you could borrow, but yeah, give something, get something.

And I expect good music. Something with a good beat.

A good beat. What year are you from?

2011

You've got a year on me. Though if I wasn't here, it'd be 2011 by now. [And he'd be a dragon, but details.] Any new hits I should be aware of?

Can't say I listen much to music, just like what I hear in clubs and stuff.

I'm partial to the blues, personally. [But then, Fables are always slow to keep up with modern pop culture.]

I like something with a good beat to move to. The cupcake's the jazz and blues lover.

Who's the cupcake?

Right, sorry. Ginia.

You mentioned her before. What's the deal there?

Two halves of the same coin.

[Give him a moment.]

So you're Ginia.

I hope you don't make it a habit of saying the wrong name.

I'm Alice, tails you could say. Ginia's heads.

So how do I know I'm talking to Ginia?

All in the language, darling.

And when in doubts, ask. Though nine out of ten times, it'll be her.

I hope she's fun.

Bit more prim and proper, but don't let that sweet face fool you.

If you need a bartender, the girl's been working in a bar since she was 16.

Well well. I like a girl who knows her way around a martini.

Please, this girl can make a martini in her sleep. Hit her up sometime about it, I doubt she'll say no.

I'll do that. I gotta say, you've got one special relationship with your alterego.

[Written]

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