Ch. 14 - Life is hunky dory when your name is Jack of Fables

[originaljackass]

[When Jack's memories returned to normal, he found himself sad only to discover his briefcase was empty. And then when he realized that, he rushed to a mirror and was relieved to find out he was still his incredibly handsome and athletic self. He wouldn't be swelling up to a dragon this time. He didn't know why he had been spared that fate this time, but he took it to be a personal victory. Smugly, he smiled at himself, reminded himself of how awesome he was, and was back to his old self again.

And so from every day since Luceti returned to normal, Jack has served more than his normal shifts at the bar. With Buffy still missing and not all of the staff at their best, he was filling in for them. After all, an experiment like that was going to result in a lot of people needing a good stiff drink. He was only pleased to oblige them. After all, Luceti had no form of therapy other than what could be found at the bottom of a glass at Good Spirits.

Today, however, he felt inclined to talk about the experience. Calmly and rationally.]

[Voice]

So that was a hell of a thing. How many of you guys remember the first one? I swear, this place gets loopier each and every day. The fighting at the end was new. Last time around it didn't get so bloody. Well, it did for me. I turned into a dragon and then had a bunch of psycho, devil-associating lesbians hunt me down to kill me. I think we can all agree that a few crazy vulture-winged assholes isn't as bad as it could be. Especially seeing as killing them is easier than shooting fowl in Duck Hunt.

And for those of you still pouting, come on down to Good Spirits. First drink's on the house.

[Jack will be around that evening to serve drinks and be his usual self. At least until he goes heading home that night. The droids get the jump on him and it's off to experimentation land for him!]

Comments

[soheartless]

[One day Mytho was living in one place, another day it was gone... He doesn't quite know where to go.

But in his wanderings, he finds himself walking into Good Spirits.]

I don't know where I am...

[originaljackass]

[Jack is rinsing a glass at the time and when he sees a kid walk in, he's less than impressed.]

Sorry, kid. We don't serve your kind here.

[soheartless]

My... kind? [He looks on uncertainly, still standing stiffly near the front door.]

I don't understand. I don't need to be served, right now.

[originaljackass]

Then why are you here?

[soheartless]

I don't know. I'm not sure where I am. [The event has left him even more dazed and confused than usual.]

[Voice]

[swordprincess]

...You mean this has happened before?

[Voice]

[originaljackass]

[That voice. This is the girl who... did the something. Maybe. Ah hell, he'll remember it.]

Yup. Back in my first trip here. Of course, we didn't have to fight anyone. And there were no cars. The cars were a nice touch.

[Voice]

[swordprincess]

Cars...?

Well...it wasn't that bad...aside from the fghting.

[Voice]

[originaljackass]

The big metal boxes people were riding around in? Those were cars.

[Voice]

[swordprincess]

Oh, those things? They were...interesting.

[smallsurvivor]

[During one of those shifts, there'll be a token little girl sneaking in behind the bar. It's been a really weird time for Clementine and she's on a quest for Jack. Jack's easiest to find when he's around booze, so she started there. It's fine that she's poking around all the bartending stuff, right?]

[originaljackass]

[Jack has been a little self absorbed lately and while he hasn't forgotten Clementine, he hasn't quite... given her the attention she needs. However, when she shows up in the bar, he guesses she isn't just here for a margarita.]

You're not supposed to touch that stuff, Clem.

[smallsurvivor]

[Jack? Self-absorbed? You don't say.]

It's fine, Jack. I'm not gonna drink it.

[originaljackass]

Good. Nobody should start boozing at your age. I mean, sure, I did, but we didn't know about the dangers of liver disease back then. Of course, I was also me, so that doesn't count. [Ah, to be young and not realize you'll be young for another thousand years still. What a thrill it was to actually be worried about old age.]

How about a milkshake?

/struts back here two weeks late

[smallsurvivor]

Jack, don't be silly! You're not that old. [Well. He's kind of ancient, but not THAT old.]

You sure like to tell a lot of stories.

action:

[shenevermisses]

[Clove shows up at the bar during the day. Cato's out; she doesn't know where, doesn't care where. She's still thinking things through herself. While she's not sure she can get a drink-- it can't hurt to try.

So, she takes a seat and makes herself smile a bit.]

Heard something over the Journals about a free drink.

action:

[originaljackass]

[Oh right. This is one of his daughters. His third newest one, he supposes. He also vaguely recalls meeting her before the whole messy business of families. But he knows her name. He'll likely not forget it any time soon, now. Well not for another four hundred years when they're all dead and he's still alive and kicking.]

And you're here to take advantage of the less stringent alcohol laws in regular old Luceti, huh?

action:

[shenevermisses]

Alcohol laws?

[Yes, that is a genuine question. She comes from a place without them.]

action:

[originaljackass]

Back where I'm from, the legal drinking age is twenty-one. As you can understand, this is incredibly frustrating for Fables that are a thousand years old but don't look a day over sixteen.

[Pinocchio and Boy Blue came to mind. Poor bastards.]

action:

[shenevermisses]

[Briefly, she can imagine how frustrating that must be. But... something else matters more in the immediate.]

What's a Fable?

action;

[dadlyinstinct]

[He doesn't hear Jack's message, not into the habit of checking his journal often, and instead walks into the bar looking for a drink. Alcohol has been limited after the Walkers appeared, but he was only a casual drinker before anyway. Of course he has no clue Jack works at Good Spirits and sits by the bar, waiting for someone behind the counter to come by.]

action;

[originaljackass]

[And wouldn't you know it, Jack emerges from the back with a fresh bottle of whiskey for another customer. After pouring that drink, he turns his attention to Lee.]

Don't you think it's a little irresponsible for you to start drinking?

action;

[dadlyinstinct]

I don't want to hear that from you, of all people.

[Because while he doesn't really know much about Jack, his first impression of the guy isn't a great one.]

Just get me a glass bourbon.

action;

[originaljackass]

What, no please? Tsk tsk.

[All the same, Jack sets out a glass and a bottle of bourbon and pours some for Lee. But not a lot. Half a serving.]

action;

[dadlyinstinct]

[Right, manners. He takes a look at the glass and quickly notices Jack didn't pour a whole serving, but takes it anyway and sips it down slow. He hasn't tasted bourbon in so long and takes the time to savor the flavor, before setting the glass down.]

Least the alcohol is good here. Got to keep everyone happy somehow.

[Because frankly, there's nothing to be happy about right now.]