originaljackass | Ch. 13 - There's no dating service quite like Jack of Fables

Entry tags:

[voice]

Ch. 13 - There's no dating service quite like Jack of Fables

[Voice - Locked to Women]

Ladies, Jack Horner here. You may have seen my movie. If not, I work at Good Spirits, the local and only bar. We run a classy joint, but it's come to my attention that my good friend and fellow server of alcoholic beverages, has been going through a rough patch. This man has been going for far too long without a good and proper fucking. The man has no girlfriend and yet he continues to serve your drinks with no complaints. Oh sure, he's constantly scowling and he's about as pleasant as a cactus, but the point is: this man is rendering a service without asking for anything in return.

So I ask you ladies, who will take one for the team and give this man some action? Sure, he's sort of plain looking and in desperate need of a haircut, but he's not that bad. I mean, here, let me show you a picture.

[The video pans to a picture Jack managed to obtain that displays Asch the Bloody. See how sad he looks? How desperate he is for some action?]

This man's name is Asch. And he needs you.

Oh, for the record, I wouldn't be against a little extra action thrown my way. Not that I'm desperate or anything. Far from it. Just thought I'd offer.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

He'll say no, not stab someone for offering.

Let's hope so, for your sake.

Edited 2013-05-25 01:49 (UTC)

[...]

Don't you owe me a dinner date? [He needs to cash in. Last time he got one, the woman went and vanished on him.]

I got busy. [And then unbusy. Overwhelmed mostly.] But now I am not busy.

Well, funny that. I'm fairly unbusy myself.

Does that mean you want to go now?

In this place, you have to embrace the present. For all I know, you'll be gone tomorrow.

... Right.

Where were we supposed to meet anyway?

Seventh Heaven. The place isn't exactly ripe with options.

You could say that again. And I thought Sunnydale was bad. [Even if it only had the Bronze as a happening place, at least it was a happening place.]

I've been to deserted worlds more exciting than this place.

Worlds without shrimp are probably more exciting than this place.

They are. Even if the food isn't as good.

Now I am hungry, so I am going to leave now.

... right. I'll leave too.

[Her abruptness leaves him wondering if she's meeting him or just getting off the journal to grab a sandwich.

Well, whatever, he heads to the restaurant anyway.]

[Anya doesn't often go too far from the plaza, so it doesn't take too long for her to show up at the restaurant. The blonde is dressed comfortably, in blue jeans and a lightly striped green shirt that gives her red tipped golden wings ample room.]

Geez, where is the service around here?

[It takes Jack a bit longer since he was actually at the bar at the time and had to excuse himself from work. So for that reason, he's in a simple T-Shirt that reads "I'm Sexy", a pair of tight jeans, and his hair tied back neatly in a ponytail. As usual, he has just enough stubble to look rugged, but not out of control. He arrives behind Anya. He is typically smug.]

The head chef recently was sent packing. Things aren't as well oiled as they used to be.

[She whirls around when he speaks from behind her.]

Does that mean we have to cook our own food?

[Smile!]

No, we just have to hope the replacement is good. And seat ourselves.

It's like a ghost town in here. [Maybe one or two occupied tables at best. Anya will turn back around and stride toward a table near the middle of the place. Something that can't be intentionally construed as romantic. It wasn't like it was a real date, or anything, and she finds it in her best interest to make that clear.]

Jack was only mildly disappointed they ended up in the middle of the restaurant and not in some quiet corner. But, well, she was still hooked on that Xander guy. He could be patient. He was, after all, immortal. So he made no romantic gestures of pulling out a seat for her or anything of that nature. He simply took his own seat and pulled up a menu.

"Ghost towns are livelier than this place. But that's because there's a lot of ghosts."

"I meant the general lack of bodies." Because a ghost town would be a lot more spirited. Anya settles down into her own seat, glancing at the menu. "Wonder if they have anything good... I want something with cheese."

"When I was here before, there was a pizza joint. They didn't exactly make them American style, but it was good." Jack shook his head with mock sadness. "Some brats put a convenience store in there instead. It's a travesty." Since this seemed to be quite off topic, he quickly backtracked. "Anyway, we should order pizza. Only seems fair."

Edited 2013-06-01 22:21 (UTC)

"... Do you think they know how to make pizza?"

She hadn't come across it on the menu yet, but it would be an easy thing to order without being complicated. Though the menu does mention that it takes custom orders that aren't on the menu as well.

"Wouldn't be much of a restaurant if they didn't, right? Stay put, I'll go find out."

He stood.

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]

[voice]

[action]

[action]

[action]

[action]

[action]

[action]

[action]

[action]

[action]

[action]